Q: When you say things you don’t mean, are you generally trying to protect yourself or someone else?
A: I’m reading this question like, yourself OR someone else, not a combined version.
Personally, I do both. 9/10 times I am trying to protect myself because I have been through a lot and put myself through a lot, so I am very defensive over certain topics. I try not to say things that are untrue or unjustifiable or even just an exaggerated version of the truth, because that accomplishes nothing. If I do say things I either don’t mean or don’t 100% know, it’s to defend myself from being hurt or feeing attacked or judged. Sometimes I’ll even defend myself so that I don’t feel stupid if I’m wrong, but it’s okay to be wrong and that is something I’m working on.
As far as defending other people, that highly depends on the surrounding conversation. If the topic is serious or very personal to that person, I am likely to defend them if they aren’t there to defend themselves, again, something I am trying to stop doing. It’s not my battle to fight.